Sex therapist Jessa Zimmerman explains how being “easygoing” or people-pleasing—rarely stating preferences and letting a partner decide—can create a hidden burden in relationships. She describes clients who didn’t realize how constant small decisions (meals, plans, TV) led to their partner’s decision fatigue and reduced connection because the partner couldn’t encounter their wants, opinions, and priorities. Zimmerman shares a practical exercise: carrying an object (like Legos) as a reminder to voice “I want/I would like” five times a day, which helped one couple reduce overwhelm and increase mutual satisfaction. She also outlines common roots of easygoing behavior, including being praised for it, growing up around someone with bigger needs, or learning to disconnect from desires to avoid disappointment.
00:00 Show Intro
00:46 Soapbox Topic Setup
01:41 Lego Pocket Exercise
02:30 Decision Fatigue Relief
04:29 Why Easygoing Hurts
05:11 How It Develops
06:55 Try a New Habit
07:11 Outro and Credits